Couchman Vs. Giant Stack of Comics!

Greetings citizens! Today is something special. For those of you who follow me on Twitter, you may have seen a few tweets from me with the #CouchmanVSGiantStackOfComics label. Well, I haven’t been able to get up to the comic shop since the beginning of May, so my pull box was quite full. In addition, I found several issues on the shelves that I wanted to pick up for one reason or another. All in all, I ended up with a stack of around twenty-five comics or so. I decided that a fun thing for me to do, in order to try and get back into the rhythm of reviewing comics, would be to go through the whole thing as quickly as I could and give some brief thoughts on each one. Well, almost each one. I cut the stack down to about seventeen comics for the review, but hey, that’s still a big pile. So, let’s dive in and conquer this stack!

First up in the stack is Ms. Marvel #16. This is the beginning of the Secret Wars tie-ins, both for the issue, and for me personally, which makes me groan. I’m not a fan of Secret Wars. The concept has potential, excising stuff from various worlds that just doesn’t work, and trying to bring everything into the main continuity. But I detest that they’re “ending” everything. Sure, I can buy that the Ultimate Universe is dead. Hell, it was mostly dead already, so it’s not like they’re losing much, especially since Ultimate Spidey is now the main Spidey. But the 616 universe? Sure, they –might- kill that, but only if they keep the vast majority of stuff from it, which means it will only be technically dead. I also hate all the freaking drama about it. This goes back to what I wrote about the Death of Wolverine story; there is no tension to it, so stop trying to make us feel tension! We’ve already gotten some announcements of things that are going to be around in the NewMU, so trying to tell us that “everything ends” is just dumb. Also, NewMU is a terrible name. If it’s intentionally trying to rip-off the New52, I only have to ask why? While there was good stuff in the New52, it was pretty widely panned, so why are you trying to make people think about it? If it’s unintentional, then how far up your asses are your heads, Marvel?

Ugh, okay, rant over. Ms. Marvel #16 is pretty solid. People fleeing from Manhattan have traveled to Jersey City, and all hell has broken loose in the city. Kamala tries to make sure her loved ones are taken care of, but is still reeling from having her heart broken. The writing is, as always, good with G. Willow Wilson making Kamala very relatable in both word and deed.

Red Sonja #16 is next, and like with Ms. Marvel, it’s solid as usual. Sonja is dying, and as people are wont to do in fiction, she sees the Goddess of Death. Death offers Sonja the opportunity to be one of her personal guards, but Sonja decides to just try and kill death. Which works out for her, as she ends up living. Admittedly, that all could’ve just been a dream, since Sonja was saved by a miracle elixir concocted by a dead alchemist, but I like to think Sonja’s just that badass. Walter Giovanni’s artwork is beautiful as always, and Gail Simone’s writing hits all the right notes. It saddens me that I recall hearing she was no longer going to be writing the series.

Next up on the block is Thors #1, written by Jason Aaron. I was interested in this series, because I am a big fan of Aaron’s writing on Thor and Star Wars, and it was an intriguing idea. Thors serve as a police force on Battleworld, crossing between the domains and reporting to Doom. I’m not fond of the idea of them serving Doom (before Secret Wars #2, I thought that they kept order for the sake of keeping order), but it is what it is. The writing is good, which is to be expected, and the artwork is also solid. All the Thors have a different outfit, making them all stand out from one another, but with enough commonality to them to identify them as part of the same group. However, what irks me is that Aaron killed off Beta Ray Bill. Considering Bill isn’t exactly a big name character, his death may be a permanent one to come from this whole mess. So, yeah, not pleased with the issue, and not sure I want to pick up the following ones.

On to something less aggravating; Sensation Comics featuring Wonder Woman #10. I’ve been reading the series for awhile now, and it is always a delight. Wonder Woman is a great super hero, and before picking up these, I hadn’t gotten any exposure to her in the comics. I did pick up a couple of issues of the main Wonder Woman title, but… it just didn’t pull me in and didn’t show off how awesome Diana is. The stories in Sensation Comics though are all about showing off how awesome she is, instead of things like pathos or character development. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy those things quite a bit, but sometimes you just want something fun and light. Issue 10’s stories focus on a singer/actress who’s branching into a less “feminine” kind of image, and Diana is brought on as extra security from a creep who’s threatening her. The second one is about a dragon who attacks a city to get revenge on Diana’s mother for killing all of his people. My love for dragons could easily fill up an entire review on it’s own, but suffice to say that seeing Diana take down a dragon is simultaneously awesome, but also a little sad.

Captain Marvel #15 is a solemn issue. Carol finally returns home from her grand space adventure to find out that her friend Tracy passed away not too long ago. Carol had known it was coming, but it was still a shock. The issue is spent hearing bits of her life, and mourning her. It’s a very well written issue, and spoke to me on an emotional level like little else has in a long while. I teared up a little, not gonna lie.

Alright, back to the Secret Wars, this time with Captain Marvel and the Carol Corps. We get introduced to Banshee Squadron, AKA the Carol Corps. The Corps serves as a fighter squadron for Hala Fields, one of the many domains of Battleworld, under the leadership of Captain Marvel. The Corps begin to question whether all of the “facts” of the world as told by Doom are truth or not. They get sent on a mission, ostensibly to take out some invading Ultron robots, but the ship they’re sent to destroy instead has people on it, though the revelation comes too late to save most of the people. Carol attempts to save them though, but she fails and is presumed dead. She later turns up at the squad’s barracks with the lone survivor. She declares that she’s going to find out the truth, and asks for her squad’s aid. It feels like a shorter issue than it is, but it’s well written and sets up the series well. I think I like this more than any of the other Secret Wars things I’ve read because it actually shows one of the heroes actually in opposition to Doom, questioning if he really is God or not. The writing by Kelly Sue DeConnick is good as always, and it makes me sad she’s not going to be writing Captain Marvel anymore. The artwork is also solid, evoking the same kind of feel as reels from World War Two and American propaganda posters. All in all, a good read, and so far the only Secret Wars title I want to follow.

Star Wars #5 and #6 continue to make me smile. Jason Aaron is great at capturing the voices of the characters, to the point where I hear them speaking in my head like the actors. The pacing feels a little on the slower side, but I tend to prefer that as it gives more time for everything to sink in and for the characters to interact. My only disappointment is that there’s no Chewie. I always liked Chewie, and am hoping to get more about him from these comics. Luke goes back to Tattoine to search Obi-Wan’s place for something – anything – to help guide him. Boba Fett is also on Tattoine looking for Luke, and the two find each other. Meanwhile, Han and Leia are scouting out possible new locations for the Rebel base, but end up having to lay low on a planet that Han’s used for such things before. Unfortunately, they get visited by a very unexpected guest; Han’s wife.

In the same galaxy far away, we’ve got Darth Vader issues 5 and 6 as well. These issues are more fast-paced, with some really nice action. It’s hard for me to describe what’s going on in these issues beyond that. It’s mostly about Vader trying to prove to the Emperor that he’s still a competent lieutenant, and him gaining a greater understanding of their relationship. I really like this series because it shows more of Vader than we’ve seen before. We see him as being more cunning, more devious, and all around more interesting than he was in the original trilogy. Don’t get me wrong, I freaking love Vader, but in the movies he doesn’t have much of a repertoire. This takes what we’ve seen before and expands it, accentuates it. The artwork is really nice as well. There are a few panels of flashback to the events of Revenge of the Sith, and damn do they look good. They practically look like screenshots, they’re that good.

I’ve been trying to get into more independent comics lately, and whilst perusing that section at my comic shop, I found one that caught my eye; Lady Mechanika #3. They sadly didn’t have any prior issues, but I figured what the hell and grabbed it, flipping through it briefly. The artwork caught my eye immediately, with a high level of detail  in the pencils, along with well modeled everything. The colors, likewise, are excellent, capturing the mood of the scenes perfectly allowing everything to stand out as being distinct. Another neat touch is that some (but understandably not all) of the panel borders have neat flourishes, mainly being made of clockwork looking pieces. It’s a neat little touch to the pages to give them a little distinctiveness. The writing is also solid, with a feel not far off of Indiana Jones, but steampunk. The beginning is a bit slow, but it picks up quickly enough. A pair of archaeologists are searching for something in Sumerian ruins called the Tablet of Destiny. One of them is being coerced into searching because the villains (the German Empire) have his daughter. But the titular Lady Mechanika, along with a fringe acquaintance of the girl’s father, rescues his daughter, Winifred. Afterwards, they head off to Africa to find him, but they’re followed by the Germans, and the issue ends with Winifred and Lady Mechanika stranded in the Sahara. I really want to try and track down prior issues in order to find out what the deal is with Lady Mechanika. She says that she has metal limbs and ghoulish eyes, so I want to get the full story.

Next is Wonder Woman #41. Like I said, I tried reading the main Wonder Woman title before, but just couldn’t get into it. However, I am a firm believer in second chances, and since the cover was showing off her awesome new costume, I figured I’d give it another shot. Not a whole lot happens in the issue, but that’s fine. The previous issues I had seen featured a bunch of stuff going on with no explanation, which made me confused and disinclined to pick up future issues. That’s one thing that really bugs me about DC’s comics in comparison to Marvel’s. Marvel gives a recap page at the beginning of each issue, allowing new readers to get caught up on general plot details that are important to the issue, and to refresh the minds of those who need it. DC lacks such a thing, so if you pick up an issue, it’s very easy to get lost. For example, last time I had picked up Wonder Woman, she mentions being the God of War, and her mother has been turned into a statue. How and when did that happen? Not to mention I had no idea who some of the other people were in said issue, including the person who created Donna Troy. Is a recap page really such a hassle to include? Or is DC saying “If you want the full story, you’ll have to buy it to find out!”? Because if that’s the case, I’m more inclined to just try and find the issues online to spite them. But, whatever, let’s talk about this issue. Diana briefly visits with the incarcerated Donna, then goes to see… some woman with a baby who I guess is Zeus? Seriously DC, recap page! Then she goes to see Hephaestus who has her sweet new outfit, and then heads off to stop a tragedy. A kid has threatened to blow himself up if he doesn’t get to meet Wonder Woman, but it turns out he was just luring her there… to meet her I guess and get a few hits in. He escapes back to his layer, where’s he’s given a Pegasus, a bow and some arrows by a magical green pool in his floor. Overall, I’m still iffy on the series. It has elements I like, but on the whole it just feels a bit lacking. Not bad, but not good either. It just sort of exists, which is a shame considering how awesome Wonder Woman is. Wonder if there’s any chance of getting Gail Simone to write the series again. Or maybe Kelly Sue DeConnick.

Starfire #1. The vast majority of my exposure to Starfire has been from the Teen Titans animated series that used to run on Cartoon Network. The only other thing I’ve seen with her, was Linkara’s review of Red Hood and the Outlaws #1, which was… much less flattering. However, this seems to be more in line with the animated series, so I’m pleased. Amanda Conner and Jimmy Palmiotti, writers who I’m somewhat familiar with because of the writing on Harley Quinn, are writing the series, and I couldn’t be happier. Starfire is in Key West, with no money or place to live. The local sheriff helps her out with those two things, and the issue ends with a big storm hitting the area, and Starfire exclaiming “X’hal!” All in all, it’s a cute and fun issue, and I’ll be adding it to my pull list next time I get to the comic shop.

Continuing the parade of new stuff, we’ve got Black Canary #1. Black Canary is one of those characters I haven’t seen much of, but I’ve liked what I’ve seen. My primary exposure to her has been in the Justice League Unlimited and Young Justice cartoons, as well as a supporting cast member of Batgirl. Her solo book has her as part of a band also called Black Canary. For some reason, she’s going by D.D, and I’m wondering what that stands for (I know her name is Dinah, which is one of them, but what’s the other?). Anyway, the band is on tour, and has been plagued by problems, mostly involving Dinah busting some heads. Their show in Detroit is different though, because it’s attacked by aliens who are after the youngest member of the band, a girl called Ditto. The band all agree to stand by Ditto, in spite of not knowing why the aliens are after her. It’s an interesting opening to the series, with some solid writing. The artwork has a nice style to it, very gestural with lots of energy. It’s got kind of a punk feel to it, though I’m hard-pressed to explain why it feels that way. I’ll be picking up the next issue, and deciding if the title is worth adding to the ol’ pull list.

Last up is Doctor Fate #1. I have a soft spot for characters like Doctors Fate and Strange. The idea of a supreme sorcerer really speaks to the nerd in me, so when I saw this, I had to pick it up. There’s apparently a lead up to the issue on DC’s website, but I’m just going with this based on its own merits. It does surprisingly well. It’s established that Anubis is causing a great flood in the Brooklyn area. Khalid Nelson has been chosen to be the wielder of the Helm of Thoth to oppose Anubis. After some denying that this is happening, Khalid accepts his fate and dons the helm. There’s a bit more to it than that, but those are the basics. The writing is decent, though being a lover of mythology, I was picking apart some of the Egyptian deity stuff, like why Anubis is the villain. If Doctor Fate is supposed to be the supreme force of order, shouldn’t he be opposing Apep? Why does Bastet give him the Helm of Thoth? Shouldn’t Thoth do that? Also, I thought it was called the Helm of Nabu, but I may be wrong about that. The artwork is good, with no major hiccups, except for one instance where the panel layout is randomly different, which threw off my reading of it. Overall, a good beginning to the series, and another one I’ll be picking up the second issue of.

Well, that’s it for Couchman VS Giant Stack of Comics. Will I do this again? Maybe, depends on if I get behind on picking up my comics again, and how well this is received. Let me know what you guys think.

Avengers: Age of Ultron

(SPOILER WARNING! If you haven't seen Age of Ultron yet, I don't recommend reading this.)

Greetings, citizens! My deepest apologies about my silence lately. It has been a busy few weeks for me due to my new job and having to get acclimated to it. Things are more or less going well though, I even had the opportunity to see Avengers: Age of Ultron twice over the weekend. So, here are my thoughts on the film.

Overall, I thought that the plot was good. It wasn’t terribly complex, but you don’t need one. Setup for Ultron’s creation, he gets introduced, begins evil scheme, Avengers thwart him. The pacing felt pretty solid without anything feeling rushed and just about every scene felt like it lasted long enough. There were two scenes that I feel should’ve gone on a bit longer, but I’ll get to that in a moment with characters. One element I really liked was Quicksilver’s death. For pretty much the whole movie, they’d been laying down some heavy foreshadowing that Hawkeye would die. One of my friends kept saying “he’s just two days away from retirement.” Thus, when Hawkeye looked like he was going to die, you can believe it. But then Quicksilver does the whole “noble sacrifice” thing. After watching the movie a second time, they actually do some foreshadowing with that though. Two of the few times when Quicksilver is caught by surprise involve bullets. Hawkeye shoots out a glass floor he’s standing on (which is pretty weird, since when does Hawkeye use a gun in anything but the Ultimate universe?) and a bullet grazes him at the beginning of the big fight against Ultron. It’s more subtle, but it’s there. Will Quicksilver return? Eh, hard to say. I’m not sure I want him to, but I’ll get into the why when I talk about the characters.

The action I’m more hesitant to say was solid. While it mostly worked, there were a couple of spots I felt could’ve been done better. The fight with the Iron Legion bots after the party is one of them. It was so dark and the camera was so zoomed in and jittery, it made it hard to tell what was going on. There were a couple of moments in other fights that had similar problems, but nothing that stood out as much. On the other hand though, there were some really strong moments. Cap fighting Ultron was pretty good, though I do wonder why he applied a choke hold to a robot (for the second time in the movie no less). The Hulk and Iron Man fight was also pretty good with lots of good work with pieces of the set. It was nice seeing more teamwork from the Avengers (mainly involving Cap, oddly), but I wish they’d pushed it a bit further.

I enjoyed the characters for the most part. We don’t really see anything new with Cap, Thor or Tony, though we do get more development of them and can start seeing the formation of Civil War. Hawkeye finally gets fleshed out some with the introduction of his family and some decent bits of dialogue/one-liners. I’ve never really liked Hawkeye, but it was something nice to see and his status as a family man makes him more unique among the Avengers (and movie superheroes in general). The Banner/Black Widow relationship is an interesting change introduced, and I like it. It felt very natural for their characters and also makes them stand out more. Speaking of Banner, I liked that they gave him more importance than The Hulk in this one. In the first one, they ostensibly brought in Banner, but everyone knew that they really wanted Hulk, and Hulk ended up being important to turning the tide. In this one though, Hulk’s importance is downplayed, and Banner’s is greater, with his scientific expertise more integral to the story.

So, let’s talk about the new characters. Wanda, Pietro and Vision unfortunately didn’t get much characterization. With Wanda and Vision it’s less of an issue, since they’re still around and are going to be in the next movie. Pietro’s dead though, and the lack of depth to his character robbed his sacrifice of greater significance. For what we do see, I like the characters. Vision’s ability to wield Mjolnir makes it pretty clear what sort of entity he is, even though he’s only in the movie for about half an hour. Pietro has some pretty entertaining moments, which makes me sad he died, though it’s always possible he’ll come back. Wanda… I honestly don’t know what to say about her. She seemed very much like a non-entity, with only her abilities mattering. Pretty much the only personality trait we get is how close she is with Pietro… which comes off as sort of Ultimates 3, if you catch my meaning. I’m not necessarily sure that’s what they were going for, but at the same time, it’s hard to not take that interpretation. That’s the main reason I said I was unsure if I wanted to Pietro to return.

The character I have the most to say about is Ultron. When I first heard James Spader announced as the voice actor for Ultron, I was hesitant. My main exposure to him was as Alan Shore in Boston Legal, so I was used to him displaying a lot of dry wit and humor, interspersed with some really great dramatic moments. I wasn’t sure he could be menacing enough to be a supervillain. My mind was changed when I saw the first trailer and heard him delivering his lines. He was so chilling in those few moments, it made me much more excited for the movie (which I’d been on the fence on because I don’t like Ultron that much). His performance was solid, as is to be expected of an actor of his caliber, but I really felt that the writing could have been a bit better. I wasn’t expecting so much humor from the android wanting to wipe out all human life, and I feel it was somewhat out of place. I am assuming that part of Ultron’s personality was based on brain patterns from Tony (though they never actually say anything like that), hence the sense of humor and a few other traits. If that’s the case, then fine, I can understand that, but it still feels like a bit of a misstep. As I mentioned before, there were two scenes which I felt could’ve benefited from being a bit longer, both of which mainly involving Ultron. The first is when he first meets Wanda and Pietro, and the second is when he’s talking to a captive Black Widow. There’s nothing wrong with the scenes themselves, I just feel that the climax that each was building to (the reveal of his first body, and then the reveal of his upgraded body) could’ve been better if there was just a bit more build up to each. But that’s just my opinion. I’m sure there are plenty of other people that would’ve felt like the scenes dragged if they went on any longer. But they presented excellent opportunities for memorable bits from Ultron, and I think they would’ve had a greater impact with an extra minute or three.

So, overall, I thought that Age of Ultron was pretty good. It had its flaws, but what doesn’t? It felt like not only a good capstone to Phase Two, but a beginning for Phase Three as well.

I will be attempting to get a proper review up for this week, as well as trying to figure things out for the Superior Spider-Man finale. Until then, citizens!

Thor (2014) issues 1-3

Greetings, citizens, and welcome to the final installment of the Couchman Birth Month Spectacular!

I’ve always been a huge fan of mythology. I remember being in third grade and reading everything I could find about the Egyptian gods and goddesses. Eventually I moved on to Grecian and Roman myths, some Native American ones, a select few Japanese, Chinese, and Indian ones, but my favorite ones of all were the Norse myths. They always had a lot of great action, more relatable characters, and a better sense of narrative flow than other myths. It’s no surprise that when I started getting into comics, I wanted to read about Thor. Fortunately, at that point in time, Marvel also decided to launch a new Thor title focusing more on the mythological aspects of him rather than the superhero ones, appropriately titled Thor: God of Thunder.

However, much as I love that series, that’s not the one I’m going to be discussing today. No, I’m going to be discussing the series that replaced it, simply titled Thor. Why this one and not God of Thunder? Well, there are a few reasons. First, I’ve been seeing a lot of negativity towards female comic characters lately, mainly regarding the new costumes of Wonder Woman and Spider Woman. While I am not very vocal about it, I do consider myself a feminist and this sort of thing bothers me. Women get the short end of the stick in comics way more often than they should. Every time a costume change comes up in regards to a female character, people flip their shit. Wonder Woman getting pants, covering up the boob-hole in Power Girl’s outfit, and now the new costumes I mentioned earlier. A whole bunch of DC’s characters are getting new costumes, but who gets most of the attention (and scorn)? Wonder Woman. So what does this have to do with Thor? Well, the big reason for this re-launch of Thor is that the mantle of Thor has been passed to a woman, and when it was announced, people lost their fucking minds. It baffled and angered me. It isn’t like this was the first time someone else had picked up Mjolnir and gained Thor’s powers;

But because we had a woman wielding the hammer, and calling herself Thor, it was freaking Ragnarok! I thought that it was an interesting idea, something new to do with one of the major superheroes of the Marvel universe, instead of just re-hashing the same thing over again.

The second reason is… well… I was actually kind of upset about the re-launch. I had been loving God of Thunder, looked forward to picking up the new issue every month, and that series was being cancelled. I didn’t think that there was any way that the new series was going to be as good as God of Thunder. I was wrong, and happy to be proved so. Jason Aaron, the writer for God of Thunder, was still the one writing the series, and one of the things I especially liked about how he wrote Thor was that he got how metal writing about a Norse god should be, and he kept that same tone in the writing for the new series. I love trying new things and falling in love with them, and this was an instance where I got to do just that. So, without further ado, THOR!

This cover has some good elements, but overall I think it’s lacking. I like the Thor logo, using Mjolnir as the O and the cross of the H, and it’s got a nice simplicity to it. The lightning on the T and going all over the rest of the cover is also neat, and adds some energy to the cover.

Truly, my wit is unrivaled, if only because few would stoop so low. Last bit of praise I’ll give to the cover is that it’s well-drawn and colored. There are some nice little details, and it’s got a solid amount of realism (though it’s not perfect, but I don’t usually care about that). However, beyond the lightning, the cover is dull. It’s just a portrait of our hero. You would think that if you’re trying to sell this new person as Thor, you’d have her doing something badass like smiting a dragon or something. Instead, it’s just her. Hell, it’s less of her than most people have seen. There was a lot of media attention surrounding this thing, including pictures of what the new Thor looked like, save for her face (more on that later). It feels like the cover was just an afterthought, like they were hoping all the media exposure and word of mouth would sell the book. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but speaking as someone who looks for new books based on their covers, it’s not a perfect strategy. If this hadn’t been a title I was looking forward to, I probably would’ve overlooked it on the shelf.

Oh, one more problem with the cover; the new Thor is barely in this issue. Seriously, she shows up on the last page, and not a moment sooner. Because of this, I’m going to do a very brief summary and give the necessary backstory for why Thor isn’t Thor anymore.

At the end of the 2014 event Original Sin (which I barely followed), Nick Fury is imbued with the powers of Uatu the Watcher or something like that, and whispers something in Thor’s ear. Whatever it was he whispered caused Thor to no longer be worthy of wielding Mjolnir, and he spent a good long while moping on the moon next to where he dropped it. Odin returns from wherever he’s been for a long-ass while, and starts trying to go back to being a dictator, in spite of the fact that they had a perfectly good system of government set up in his absence. Meanwhile on Earth, a company called Roxxon has discovered the Skull of Laufey, and the frost giants want it. Malekith, king of the dark elves, has allied with the giants and aids them in attacking a Roxxon facility in search of the skull. Thor goes to stop the giants and Malekith, but without Mjolnir, he’s defeated and has his left arm severed. Back on the moon, a woman shrouded in darkness is deemed Worthy and picks up Mjolnir. Okay, onto issue two.

This is a much better cover. It’s our new Thor about to smack a frost giant in the face with Mjolnir while lightning arcs outwards. The image even covers up part of the Thor logo, because it’s obvious exactly what book this is, and if you don’t recognize it, it doesn’t matter because it’s clearly about some badass who smashes giants in the face and commands lightning. Why would you not want to read about that?

So, I suppose now it’s time to talk about our new Thor, starting with the costume. I personally really like it. It’s really simplistic, with very little actual armor, only a breastplate, helmet and a single bracer. Oh, and the big-ass belt is technically also armor, I suppose. Her cape is a tad on the long side, and she’s also got one of those combat skirt things that’s open in the front for mobility, but those both add a nice, dynamic flair to the figure while fighting, and help frame the character while still. There’s a good balance if color to the design, different from classic Thor, but close enough to be recognizable. One of the most noteworthy things is that the helmet, unlike with classic Thor, conceals her face. One of the big things with the story so far (through issue six that is) has been that her identity is a mystery to all, save for Mjolnir. In the first issue there was some hinting at Freyja, Thor’s mother, was a candidate, but pretty much from the get-go of issue two I was ready to rule her out, and I’ll explain why.

The issue opens with our new Thor surrounded by lightning, completely awestruck by the power she now wields. Her thought balloons and her speech balloons are somewhat at odds with each other; her thoughts are worded as most people’s would be, the font representing that by being whatever the standard comic font is. Her words however are more dramatic and archaic (y’know, thee, nay, dost, that sort of thing) and the font is the Asgardian font. The thoughts are what eliminated Freyja as a possible identity of our mystery Thor, because the Asgardians thoughts are the same style as their words. The difference that this illustrates made me think that it was a human, and clearly someone familiar with Thor.

Our hero doesn’t let the overwhelming power distract her for too long though, for Midgard is in peril! She flies off towards Earth, only briefly wondering how in Hel’s name you steer. It turns out that Mjolnir does the steering, which is something that I’ve always wondered, but seems obvious in retrospect. She lands on the Pacific ocean, but in a surprising turn of events, it’s completely frozen for as far as the eye can see, and features a tower of ice sticking up from it. Thor begins climbing it, and inside she finds not only an army of Asgardians frozen within, but Earth’s Mightiest Heroes as well. She begins to feel that she’s in over her head, but her introspection is interrupted by a patrol of frost giants. What follows is four pages of Thor being a badass and fighting the giants as well as a couple of their hounds, bringing the thunder and wiping the floor with them.

Sadly, we have to cut away to the top of the tower, where we see one of Roxxon’s floating islands under assault from the frost giants. The CEO of Roxxon, Dario Agger, is adamant about defending the place, regardless of how many of his employees he has to sacrifice. In spite of this, Malekith is able to make it to Agger, and we see that he’s wearing Thor’s severed arm as some sort of grotesque fashion accessory.

He states his demands, but Agger’s got personnel to deal with people, so he heads down to the vaults. Unfortunately for him, however, there are already giants down there attempting to find the skull. Agger’s about to turn into a minotaur (which is sort of his thing), but Thor bursts up through the floor. While she begins beating the crap out of the giants, Agger heads into one of the vaults, and accidentally seals Mjolnir inside it with him. Normally, that’s not much of a problem, but this vault is constructed of vibranium and coated in adamantium, so the hammer is trapped and our issue ends with Thor facing down the giants without the hammer.

Issue three’s cover isn’t bad, but it lacks the punch that issue two’s had. Still, it’s some good symbolism, Thor breaking through the ice representing her defeat of the frost giants. Kinda spoils what’s going to happen though.

The issue opens with a flashback of Malekith convincing Skrymir, king of the frost giants, to launch an invasion of Earth. Back in the present, Thor is surrounded by giants, but before the fighting begins, we get a bit of verbal sparring between her and Malekith. I said it a couple weeks ago when looking at Star Wars, but Jason Aaron writes some good dialogue. His version of Malekith is easily my favorite that I’ve seen. He’s slimy and arrogant, and significantly more threatening in how casual he is about atrocities. He’s so loathsome, but entertaining to read at the same time. Thor meanwhile has a good amount of archaic speech, but not so much that it feels forced. I also love the juxtaposition of her inner thoughts being doubtful, but her words being filled with bravado.

So Malekith lets the giants have at her, and they screw around trying to just kill her with their spit until Skrymir freezes her and swallows her whole. Well… that certainly could’ve gone better. I uh… guess we’ll just watch the giants and Malekith break into the vaul-

Oh wait, this is THOR, of course getting eaten doesn’t deter her. She fights with the giants (using Skrymir’s jawbone as a weapon) while Malekith magics his way into the vault, where he and Agger begin fighting. Thor’s power is draining away, but she does manage to smash a hole in the floor and all the way through the floating island, sending most of the giants plummeting. With them out of the way, she attempts to pry the door to the vault open while Mjolnir continues to pound at the other side. She gets it open just before the power fades from her entirely, and Mjolnir finishes off the remaining giants before returning to her hand. Tired of all this bullshit, she decides to just smash the damn skull so nobody can have it. Malekith promises her a war, but his threat is interrupted by the original Thor, wielding his axe, and with a metal arm to replace the one Malekith took. Now, a sensible man would go straight for the guy who cut off one of his limbs, but Thor is kind of an idiot, so the issue ends with him about to throw down with our new Thor.

These issues are an excellent start to the series. It begins with high stakes to test our new hero and prove that she’s truly Worthy, and she rises to the challenge like a champ. I already went into the dialogue a bit, but every exchange is equally well done, and the pacing for each issue is fast, but not rushed. I didn’t really touch on the artwork much, but it’s pretty solid all around. The action sequences are executed well, with a lot of detail and just enough chaos to make it seem like an actual fight. Best of all, Aaron is clearly taking our new Thor just as seriously as the Odinson. I was worried at first that the tone would be very different from what I’d come to expect, but damned if I wasn’t pleasantly surprised. This Thor is every bit the badass that the previous one was, and I look forward to whatever adventures she faces.

Well, this wraps up the Couchman birth-month celebration! As much fun as it was looking at these things that are (at least tangentially) dear to my heart, I’m looking forward to getting back to the previously scheduled stuff. The main reason is because we’re very near the end of Superior Spider-Man, and I’ve got something special planned for that. Until next week, citizens!